Stories

Today is Wear TWLOHA day. I haven't posted about the organization TWLOHA much yet, other than to note a few quotes from the founder (and my personal hero) Jamie Tworkowski. I'm not sure why I haven't posted about it yet, other than the fact that it just hasn't really come up yet.

I love TWLOHA (To Write Love On Her Arms). For my readers that don't really know what that is, in a nut shell it is an organization that seeks to speak into the darkness of depression and to reach out to those dealing with self-mutilation and other similar addictions. It's an organization that I stand behind fully. I am passionate about their cause. If you want to know more about them, I'd encourage you to check out their website here. 

TWLOHA is encouraging their supporters to wear TWLOHA apparel today in an attempt to open doors and make opportunities to spread their message today. They are encouraging people to tell their stories. TWLOHA is all about stories. They talk a lot about the fact that you are a living story and your story is important.

All of this is not to simply state my support for an organization that I love, but to segue into what I've been wanting to post about today: the concept of story. Stories fascinate me. Perhaps it is because I am a writer and have an incredible love for words, but the fact that I am a living story is so amazing to me. Every day of my life is a new page, and I just think that's so cool. I am a living story, and that means that I have something worth telling people.

A few weeks ago, someone spoke in chapel about stories. I loved the sermon and look back at my notes often. Something that he pointed out was about who we're allowing to write our stories. Who has the pen? Who is in control? I know that often times, I try to be the writer of my own story. I try to take control, and I always fail. I always screw it up. But I've found that when I release control and allow God to write my story, He is faithful. Psalm 139:16 says "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." God has already written our stories. I just think that's so cool. God already has this incredible story written out for us, and we just have to walk in that story and let him take the pen.

One thing I've been praying over today as Wear TWLOHA day is Psalm 139:11-12. " If I say, 'Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,' even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you." I've been praying that stories will be told, that people would have the boldness to stand up with shaking knees and voices and tell their friends that they are currently, or have in the past, struggled with things like self-mutilation. I've been praying that through that, the hope of Christ would be revealed and darkness would be defeated. I've been praying against the strongholds of depression and addiction. I've been praying that lives would be changed and healed today.

I want to encourage you to tell your story. It is worth telling and you have been given it for a reason. No matter what mistakes you've made or things you've struggled with, God has a reason for your story. I believe that telling our stories will change others. I believe that that's why God gave us these stories. I believe that if we are not telling our stories we are not allowing God to work through the story He has given us.

I know it's hard to tell your story sometimes. It's hard to stand up and talk to someone that's struggling with something you've once struggled with and say that you've been there too. It's scary. It's not an easy thing to do, but I know we should. I know I should.

I don't freely tell my story. I don't just open up to everyone about what I've struggled with in the past. It's not something I usually share. But I've realized that I am robbing God of the ability to work through me when I refuse to tell the story He's given me. When I refuse to reach out to the girl downtown with scars up and down her arms and tell her that I know there is hope because I have personally been delivered from struggles with depression and self-mutilation, I am making my story useless. I went through those things for no reason if I don't use my story to reach others for Christ.

So today, I will tell my story. I will be vulnerable. And I will be very, very afraid. A lot of tears will be shed today, by me, and by many others in the world. But knowing that there are countless others out there wearing TWLOHA apparel and standing with me, speaking stories of hope and truth, makes it a little bit easier. Because others tell their stories, I will have the boldness to tell mine. Because Christ gave me this story, I will make Him known through it.

No Complaints

I complain a lot. I'm pretty sure that about 70% of the things that I say are complaints, if not more. I don't know why I complain so much, I just do. It fills the time. It seems like the only thing to say sometimes. It's not like I have a horrible life. I love my life. I am so blessed. But I still complain, a lot.

Yesterday, out of the blue, I decided that today I would not complain at all. I dragged two of my friends along with me on my adventure of not complaining so I had some moral support and people to keep me accountable when I started complaining.

I realized I complain a lot more than I thought. Before today, I didn't realize how much I complain. And it's about useless things, too. I say I'm tired a lot. And really, who cares? We're in college. We're all tired, and me sitting here complaining about my lack of sleep isn't helping that fact. I also complain in my mind a lot. Most of the things I have to think are complaints about something. And even though I took the time today to try hard to make sure those things didn't leave my mouth, I still thought them a lot. As I was on my way to my Global Perspectives class this morning grumbling in my mind about how cold it was outside, I asked God to help me take my complaints and turn them to praises. I began to think of how awesome God is every time I wanted to complain about something, and let me tell you, it really changed my whole day. I had a much better attitude because instead of wasting time thinking about all the little things that are wrong in my life, I took the time to thank God for all the big things that are right in my life.

As I was in the prayer room talking with God today, I looked up verses about complaining and found Phillipians 2:14 :

"Do everything without complaining or arguing."

 And I thought to myself, Do everything without complaining or arguing, Elyse. Everything. Not just today. Every day of your life. Do your homework without complaining. Write your papers without complaining. Walk in the cold without complaining. Clean your room without complaining. Serve others without complaining. Study without complaining. Pull all-nighters without complaining. Be tired without complaining. Don't just not complain when things are good, but also when things are not so good. Do every single thing without complaining.


It's not easy. Today was difficult and I did screw up, but I've read that 21 days makes a habit. So for the next 21 days, I am going to try my hardest to not complain. I am going to instead praise God for the things I have. I am going to be thankful and mindful of Him instead of wasting time complaining in my head. I'm going to do it, and I'm going to watch God change me from the inside out and it's going to be wonderful.

I encourage you guys to do the same. And hold me accountable. When I start complaining about the fact that I have to get up for my 7:45 class, remind me of my commitment to God. I'm going to need people to do that for me. I just want to encourage you guys to remember that everything you do reflects Christ, and I'm not saying this from some holy high-horse, because trust me, I screw up all the time, but I think that if we, as a body of Christ, committed ourselves more to thinking and talking about God's blessings instead of complaining about the small stuff, we could see God change a lot of lives and do a lot of really incredible things.

Missionary At Heart

I'm just having one of those weeks when America is the last place I want to be. Don't get me wrong, this is a great county. I'm so grateful to live here. I just don't want to be here anymore.

I'm called to missions. The only thing I have ever wanted to be is a missionary. I've been on lots of short-term mission trips, and on these trips, I have had so many life-changing experiences. I have fallen in love with so many different cultures and countries. Coming back from that is hard. America is not my favorite place in the world. In fact, I could name 10 places off the top of my head that I'd rather be than America.

But I have to realize that God has me here for a reason. He has me here, not just at North Central, but in Minneapolis, for a reason. He didn't just put me here to go to school and learn about Him so that I could become a missionary. Yes, that is one of the reasons I am here. But there are so many other reasons I am here and I need to remember that. God called me to be a missionary - why should I wait until I go to another country? I need to be more engaged in the culture around me here in Minneapolis. I need to love and to reach out more because these people are God's people just as much as the kids in Haiti are. They are just as desperate for Christ and if they die and go to Hell because I didn't reach them - that is on my head. I just can't keep living with that and feeling okay. I need to be more in love with the people in the place that I am now.

This is just something God has been speaking to me lately and I thought I'd share it with you, because it applies to everyone - wether you're called to be a missionary or not. You need to reach out to the people around you. Yes, Christ said to go into all the world and preach the gospel, but sometimes we just need to go next door and do the same thing.

I just want to encourage you guys to do that. Pray for the people in your community. Love them the way Christ loves them. Go out of your way to serve them. Tell them about Jesus. God put you where you are now for a reason - don't take it for granted.

So as I look up mission trips I want to go on and dream of other countries, I know that God will call me there soon enough. I know I am not meant to live in America for the rest of my life. I know God has this incredible plan for my life. I know there is a reason I have such a heart for people that are not American, why it breaks my heart to see people from other countries struggling. I know that God created me to be a missionary somewhere else, and my time will come soon enough - but for now, I just need to focus on being Christ to the people that are around me every single day.