Why ANOTHER Blog?

Hello (:

For those of you that know me, you may or may not know that I have another blog on Tumblr, but I've decided that it's time to enter the fascinating world of Blogger yet again (I've done this in the past, just never really kept up with it) and see where it takes me.

For those of you that don't know me, and I guess also for those of you that do, you know that I call a small town in Michigan home. I hated it when I lived there, but now I am 714 miles away in Minneapolis, Minnesota, and I miss it more than any other place in the world. I just moved here, and I'm chasing after a dream God put in my heart quite a few years ago. I'm currently 18 years old, attending North Central University, and majoring in Intercultural Studies with a TEFL track. I'm going to be a missionary to China when I "grow up" and I guess that's really all you need to know about me for now.

Moving here was, and still is, quite the adjustment. I've been away from home before and I have always dreamed about being here, so for the months leading up to the move, I was ready. I was thinking "hey, piece of cake." But when I finally had to say goodbye to everyone back home, reality hit me like a ton of bricks. I didn't want to leave. And even when I got here, I wanted to go back home.

There are still days I want to go home. I want to quit. I want to turn around and get on a plane and call it quits. And I could do that. I could take the easy route. I could go back home and go to a community college and live at home and have all my friends and my church and I could grow up to do some career that pays the bills. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that community college is bad or staying home for a few years is settling for second best for everyone, but it would be for me. It would be a slap in the face to God, because God created me as a dreamer, as a risk-taker, as someone that steps out in faith for what He has me. And weather I like it or not, this is what He has for me. This is where I belong. This is where I have been dreaming of my whole life.

Dreams are crazy. I've always known that I'm a dreamer, that I'm someone that listens to what God wants for me and chases after it with all that's in me. I've never been afraid to risk everything for something better that God has in store. That is, until I got here. When I got here, I was terrified. I was so afraid of everything, and it was a weird thing to me. I felt like I should have just been happy and excited that everything I've been dreaming of is finally happening, but I wasn't. I was so, so afraid. I still am. Every second of every day here terrifies me. It breaks my heart to be away from the people I love. It sucks, a lot.

But I love it here. I love it here because I know that this is what God has for me. And every second of every day terrifies me, but it also excites me. It excites me because I am home. It may not feel like it yet, but I am. I am where God wants me. And I just have to trust that He knows what He's doing. I have to have faith in Him. I have to step out and move on and it hurts, but it also fills me with incredible joy. It's a roller coaster of emotions.

This is a journey. It's a new chapter in my life. It's the start of the next four years I will spend here at NCU, and the start of the rest of my life. It's where my dreams start coming true, and where they will continue to come true. Every journey has different things in store, and it's like I've just set of on this road trip. I know where the beginning is and I know where the end is, but I don't know what's in the middle. I don't know what's along the road. And I may come up to some detours or traffic or even accidents, but I have to believe that God will be with me every step of the way. And so will you guys. And I guess I've just been saying all of this to say that this is why I have created this blog: to share with you guys. To show you what God is showing me, what God is brining me to and through. I'm on this crazy journey of watching everything I have ever dreamed of come true, and I guess you guys are kind of along for the ride.

I'll try to keep up with this as much as possible, and to stay vulnerable and real. I hope you guys keep reading. (: